Finding your culture pt 2

I’ve been thinking about my previous post on Finding your culture and I have some additional thoughts and questions to pose.

In my last post I discussed how we are searching for a culture where we belong or fit in. I’ve been thinking that perhaps this is the reason why we enter into intercultural relationships to begin with, even if we do so unconsciously. Perhaps it is through the exploration of getting to know someone new, getting to know their culture and their perspectives that we thrive on or internally long for.

It’s kind of like the expression “you’re an old soul” or “you’re born into the wrong generation.” Whether we are aware of it or not, our hearts have deep, subconscious desires that we must work to fulfill in order for us to be truly happy. I honestly believe that this is what we are fulfilling through any relationship in our lives. But if we have an internal desire to find a new culture where we ‘fit in’ better, then perhaps this is why we tend to gravitate towards intercultural relationships. The same principle could also be applied to inter-religious relationships as well.

Maybe I’m crazy and this whole post just sounds like a bunch a jibberish, I’m not really sure. Has anyone else ever pondered this? Do you think this might have something to do with intercultural relationships or am I just crazy?


4 Comments on “Finding your culture pt 2”

  1. I pondered it, and I think ther eis some truth in it indeed. Though I can’t say I necessarily fit better in Indian culture than I fit in Swiss one, I just ended up finding a comfy spot in the middle over the years…of course that might always change 🙂

  2. Hi Jessica, nice blog. Your two posts got me thinking about this. I don’t think it’s crazy at all to acknowledge that we do try to fulfill a part of ourselves through our relationships, including our unconscious desires to explore parts of ourselves that are ‘different’ culturally or personally.

    I like to think that I’m with my partner because we’re two individuals with simmering hot chemistry…and that it’s not got anything to do with being self-consciously ‘intercultural’. But if I’m going to be honest, there’s a lot of truth to what you’re saying. There’s no doubt that being with him let’s me fit into something different to and more comfortable than the two cultures I was brought up in (I grew up in Australia with South Asian parents, my partner is southern African). Thanks for your posts.

  3. Thanks Cyn and taswin12 for agreeing with me. I’m glad to know that I’m not the only one that thinks there is some truth to this–even if we don’t want to admit it to ourselves.

    I’m glad I’m not going crazy :D, LOL

  4. What you say definitely resonates for me, too. Neither A nor I “fit” perfectly into our own cultures or religions, so being in an intercultural relationship gives both of us room to hold onto what we value and adapt or leave out what doesn’t fit our values and worldviews. Of course…I’m also comfortable with a “pragmatic” view of relationships (e.g., I’m comfortable identifying all the reasons we “really” got married, beyond “we loved each other”), whereas some people might not feel comfortable saying there was any “reason” they ended up in an intercultural relationship.

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