One of the reasons that Abhi and I decided to establish some roots is that we were ready to start a family. In 2014 we were blessed to welcome a son into the world. I never realized someone could feel so much love and happiness as I do when we look at our little one. Who cares if this is cliche and over used— I’ve never heard truer words.
When in an intercultural relationship, it seems as though everybody is concerned about your future children. And let me tell you there is no shortage of ignorance. I often feel that some people that are in an intercultural relationship carefully weigh the issues that come with living with different cultural backgrounds, which will be predominant with the children, acceptance of their mixed children etc. etc. before deciding to get married or deciding to have children. To be quite honest, none of this even crossed my mind. But it certainly crossed the mind of some of my extended family members. On our first Christmas together after getting married my Aunt, who I believe was convinced that Abhi and I were only together so he could get his green card, told me that all Indians have lots of children and that I was going to be expected to have lots of children too. (Little does she know that I would love a big family, but certainly not because culture dictates it). Meanwhile, other family members have expressed concern over my children being exposed to one culture over another (primarily that he’ll have more Indian culture than American culture).
Here’s the thing though, it doesn’t matter what my culture is, it doesn’t matter what my husband’s culture is. It is our decision on how many children we want to have, how we want to raise them, where we want to raise them, and the values that we will instill in them. We both love our son unconditionally. Our family has grown from two to three. We will instill in our son a global perspective and will teach him to love and respect others regardless of where they hail from, what they believe. It is our duty as parents to teach him to love and respect with the hope that the world in which they will grow up in and live is a little bit of a better place.